Three Lessons I Learned from My Grandma

My Sweet Grandma 

My grandma was one of my dearest friends. She was smart and relevant. She was spunky and funny. She was authentic and bold. But what stands out the most about her to me and those who knew her is that Grandma was passionate about following Jesus and soaking up His Word. It seemed that no matter what the topic or length of conversation, she would always find a way to weave in a Scripture verse or truth about God's character. Talking about the Lord came naturally to Grandma, because she was talking about Someone she knew well.

My family had the privilege of living five minutes away from Grandpa and Grandma's house so, as you can imagine, there are many things that she taught me from our frequent interactions. I would like to share with you just a few of those life lessons:

1. BE A LADY

Grandma at age 19  

Note: If you are a guy, read on! Apply this to your wife-search if you are single, and if you are a father, remind this to your daughter:)

Did you know that just because you are a woman, it does not mean you are lady? It's a simple concept, but one that my grandma used to remind me of often: "Charity, be a lady".  Unfortunately, being a lady is becoming more and more of a rarity in this day and age and Grandma knew it.  The media overwhelms us with countless messages concerning how females should look, dress, and act. There are women who use their gender as some sort of power to be used against men, or those who distort the definition of a lady to mean a mere sexual icon. I love the following definition of a lady: a well-mannered and considerate woman with high standards of proper behavior.  This is the kind of woman that my Grandma was encouraging me to be and the kind of lady that is contrary to the common culture's definition. This lady does not use crude language or dress to entice. She carries herself with dignity and respect; she walks with a confident, yet humble disposition; she is laced with feminine mystery. In our striving to be a lady in the purest form and fashion, shouldn't we look to the One who came up with the whole idea in the first place? Grandma sent me to Him time and time again...

2. One Always Manages to Do Those Things They Consider Important

Grandma's Calligraphy

Grandma was really good at calligraphy. I have this framed quote sitting by my computer as a reminder from her that I will always find time to do the things that I deem necessary, no matter how full my life gets. Oftentimes a Christian's greatest excuse for not spending time in the Word is that they are just too busy. I have said this on more than one occasion, and then I find myself at the gym or on Facebook and the thought hits me that I am obviously not too busy to find time to accomplish those things! There are some seasons of life (such as being a mom of small kids) when having time to get it all done truly does feel impossible. If you are in this season, listen to what my friend, Heidi St. John (mom of 7) has to say to encourage your heart in this area. 


3. APPLY the "ABC's"
Note: If you are not a follower of Christ or you are exploring the Christian faith, the following points may sound unfamiliar to you. If you are interested in a greater expounding, check out this fabulous sermon by John Piper (you can either read or listen to it). 

One of Grandma's many illustrations 

A. Put off the old man by consciously obeying Romans 6:11a. Agree with God that your old nature was crucified with Christ. 
B. Put on the new man by consciously obeying Romans 6:11a. Agree with God that you are a new man, indwelt by God's Holy Spirit. 
C. Obey James 4:7 and 1 Peter 5:6-7. Resist that Tempter in the power of Christ! Remember: the battlefield is in the mind! 

What is something that you learned from your Grandma?

Love your family, ya'll!
~Charity~

GL: 20 Things I Want to Tell Engaged and Newlywed Women

Today's Guest List (GL) post comes from Joy over at Grace Full Mama.

I happened to land on Joy's blog several months ago and then revisited it again recently when a friend posted a link to her site on Facebook. 

The following marriage advice list is chocked full of rich truths and wise reminders. Most importantly, it comes from the heart of a woman who is rooted in the Lord's strength and not her own.  I pray that it will be an encouragement to you as it was to me. 

So without further ado, here is Joy!

One Simple Way to Serve Your Man

Fill Up His Cup- Now your husband's beverage of choice may be something different, but as for my Jared, he loves a nice cold glass of sweet tea (sweetened with stevia of course:). So, as a small gesture of saying 'I love you', I try to serve him by keeping his cup full. 

In the morning, if I'm in the kitchen before he is, I'll pour him a glass and set it on the table... 

In the afternoon, I try to make sure he has a fresh glass waiting for him when he comes home from work...

In the evening, I keep an eye on his glass at dinner and refill it when it gets low... 

On the weekend, when he's reading on the couch or catching up on emails, I'll set a cold glass beside him on a coaster...

Now some of you may be thinking, "Listen, lady, I'm no waitress. Just wait until you have kids and you'll see how unreasonable this idea is." Well, I'm not a waitress either and you're right, I don't know what it's like to have children, yet. But I do know that it takes approximately 9.3 seconds to do the task I am suggesting (5.2 seconds if he prefers no ice) and there are multiple opportunities throughout the day to attempt it at least once. 

Maybe you feel that you already spend an ample amount of time serving your man by cleaning up his dishes, washing his clothes, and buying his groceries.  While these tasks are by all means good and servant-oriented, do they specifically show your man that you are attentive to him and care about his needs?  Whether it's by preparing him a beverage or not, find something you can do that communicates these things to him. 

As a follower of Christ our attitude should be that of a servant-- striving to meet the needs of others (i.e. you husband is your number one 'other') and not only look to our own interests (Phil. 2). This is not easy to do, but we serve "with the strength that God supplies, so that in all things Christ may be glorified!" 1 Peter 4:10-11

So ladies, go pour a glass of something refreshing for your man! I believe it will do a lot more than quench his thirst. 

In what way do you "fill up your man's cup" ?

Love never fails, ya'll!
~Charity~

GL: 5 Ways to Sabotage Your Marriage Before it Starts

Today's Guest List is an article that I ran across from the President of Focus on the Family, Jim Daly.  The ministry of FOTF provides ample materials and resources to 'help families thrive'. Explore the website if you get a chance...there are many articles full of sound and wise counsel on a multitude of issues. 

In the Fall of 2007, I had the opportunity to study at the Focus Leadership Institute, a branch of Focus on the Family. I attended excellent classes on Biblical Worldview, Marriage and Family, and Leadership Development. Furthermore, I got to experience the beautiful surroundings of Colorado Springs, Colorado! If you are between the age of 19-26, I highly recommend you check out this 8-12 week spiritually enriching program. 

Without further ado, here is Mr. Daly!

Blessings, 

Charity 

Five Facts About Me

My Amazing Husband and I

Hello! 

I don't intend this blog to be a place where I reflect on events in my life or post daily musings. Partly because I am a slow writer and partly because I don't think I would have enough subject matter!

My blog posts will never be very lengthy (except for this one) and will always consist of some type of list-- sometimes light-hearted, sometimes informative, and I hope always helpful to at least one person out there :)

 If you are interested in knowing a little bit about the "person behind the pen", here are 5 facts about me:

1. Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior- I am a committed follower of Christ and strive to walk in daily obedience to Him--not in a desperate attempt to earn His love, but because I am deeply compelled by His love. "He saved me, not because of righteous things I had done, but because of His mercy" Titus 3:5. A person does not become instantaneously holy the moment they become a Christian. Although they stand before the Lord forgiven and cleansed from their sins through Jesus, the Christian's life is a journey of sanctification- the process of being made more like Christ. We may stumble and fall along the way, but two things are always evident in the life of a true believer: repentance from sin (James 4:7-10) and fruit of the Holy Spirit (Gal. 5:16-26). It is this journey that you will find me on today, by God's grace. 

2. I adore my husband- I married the most incredible man. He is godly, courageous, wise, diligent and my best friend. As you may have already guessed, there will be a list about him later:) We got married in November of 2011 after a whirlwind dating experience that began when we were thousands of miles apart.  Jared loves adventure and is very skilled at riding motorcycles and shooting guns, among many other things. He currently serves in the Army and recently completed Ranger School. Here is a picture of us on his graduation day. I was SO proud! He was so sleepy :)

Together again!

3. We are going to have a baby- Jared and I have been looking forward to starting a family since the day we got married. We are very excited to meet our little Decker munchkin (as Jared says) in March of 2014. Check out our surprise gender reveal here!

Munchkin!

4. I am the Logistics Manager for Apologia- I have been blessed with a job that allows me to work from home and invest in something that I am passionate about. Apologia is a ministry that supports home school families by providing biblical-based curriculum, encouraging resources, and a whole lot more. You can find more about them on their website. Since Jared and I were both home schooled, we look forward to continuing this method of education with our own children one day. 

5. I teach group fitness- Let me clear about one thing: I am not a Zumba instructor:) I started teaching classes my freshman year of college and enjoy teaching anything from Boot Camp to Kickboxing to Sculpt. No dance moves for me please, just good ole athletic conditioning. 

Thanks for stopping by, ya'll!
~Charity~

Five Ineffective Ways to Lose Weight

1. Using chopsticks- Seriously, ya'll, just because you replace your fork with chopsticks to eat that mac and cheese does not mean you will miraculously shed pounds! Although it may be a good way to make yourself eat slower, (as with the suggestion to hold your fork in your left-hand if you are right-handed), it will probably just be frustrating and lead you to emotional eat. Backfire!  

2. Skipping breakfast- If you are one of these people, I'm sorry, but I just cannot relate. Breakfast is my absolute favorite meal of the day!! Research continually proves that it is imperative to eat a healthy breakfast (eggs, turkey bacon, oatmeal, fruit, etc.) in order to get your metabolism goin'. Furthermore, skipping breakfast only makes you more ravenous towards the end of the day and, therefore, much more likely to indulge on dinner.

3. Shaking a weight- Okay. If you have purchased one of these, I do not mean to pick fun. It's just, well, this is really not an effective way to build muscle tone and lose weight. No further comment.

4. Popping pills- Don't buy into the lie that diet pills will make your weight magically disappear...at no cost to your health! Educate yourself before you take the risk and most importantly, avoid pills that contain ephedra like the plague! 

5. Drinking Diet Soda- In an attempt to lose some extra pounds, you sacrifice your real soda drinking habits to diet soda, and Voila! The weight falls right off, right? Wrong. Research has shown consistent evidence that ingesting that potent, chemical-filled liquid will actually do the opposite. Check out what Dr. Mercola has to say about the issue on his website here, and sign up for his daily newsletters, if you haven't already . I know getting off soda may seem daunting...it definitely was for me, too. Equip yourself with reasons why you need to avoid it and it will make staying away from it a whole lot easier. 

Do you have any ineffective ways to lose weight that you would like to share?

Take care of your bodies, ya'll!
~Charity~ 

Six Random Kitchen Tools That Make Life Easier

1. Salad Spinner. At my house, we eat A LOT of salads. I tend to enjoy a combination of spinach and other leafy greens, while Jared loves fresh romaine. I purchased this salad spinner at Bed Bath and Beyond with a coupon, but you can find them just about anwhere. I chop up the lettuce, throw it in the colander to wash off, and then give it a whirl. It's good practice for learning how to start a mower if you don't already now how:) Ta-da! Clean, crisp lettuce that's at a much better price than the bagged kind!

Salad Spinner

2. Onion Chopper. I am an onion-lovin' gal. I could eat them sauteed in large chunks in any meal that called for them or simply suggested them, for that matter. Unfortunately, I married a man who is not as fond of them (that is an understatement) and will only eat them in minuscule pieces (that is also an understatement). Introducing, the onion chopper! I actually acquired this Pampered Chef chopper from my Mimi during her recent move. As you can imagine, it has made onion preparation much easier! It is super easy to disassemble and wash, as well--I usually just throw mine in the dishwasher. Look for it on Amazon!

Onion Chopper 

3. Cutting Mat. Call me cheap, but I love my plastic cutting mats. They come in all different sizes and colors to help designate food items for each one (meats, veggies, fruits). I really like how flexible they are, which makes it easy to transfer the food from the mat to the dish. Just bend the mat to form a scoop and pour! They also take up minimal storage space (I stick my 5 or 6 mats in the rag/towel drawer for easy access). I can't remember where I found my set, but I know Target carries a cute pack. Go figure. 

Cutting Mat

4. Kitchen Scissors. I know the ones in the picture below are not actual kitchen scissors, but they are scissors that I use only in my kitchen :) I did have some official kitchen scissors from Target, until I left them at a potluck recently. So I found an extra, unopened set of regular shears in my office and come to find out, they work like a charm in the kitchen! They are super sharp and I use them in place of a knife for cutting up raw chicken because for some reason, it's easier to handle. We also use them for slicing up our homemade pizza- that's one less gadget I have to fit in my drawer!

5. Mini Spatula. I love love love this mini spatula for so many reasons. It's not like those big plastic-made spatulas where the edges start to melt after the first few uses. It's small and durable and has a stainless steel blade to cut up chicken or sausage in the pan. It's perfect for flipping fried eggs and pancakes. I use mine every time I cook. In fact, I had to get two :) I'm pretty sure I purchased mine via an Amazon site a while back, but I did a quick search just now and found it here. 

6. Sharp Knife. I grew up hearing my Grandma and Mom stress the absolute necessity of having a good knife in the kitchen. Good=Sharp. If you have ever worked with a dull-bladed knife, you know how frustrating it makes food prep. I used to work up a sweat cutting potatoes because of how much energy I had to exert. My mom actually found the knife pictured below at a Myrtle Beach flea market and gave it to me as a 'happy'.  It glides right through those potatoes! Another great knife I would recommend is a ceramic paring knife. I have one of these too:) 

Scissors, Spatula, Knife

What's a random kitchen tool that has made your life easier?

Work is a blessing, ya'll!
~Charity~

4 Canisters in My Kitchen

                                         
1. PROTEIN POWDER! This is an all natural protein powder sweetened with stevia. It's low in calories and tastes delicious! I love the chocolate flavor best. You can find it at Vitamin Shoppe. 

2. STEVIA! I don't have sugar in the house. If we need some sweetened tea or a yummy treat, stevia always does the trick! Just remember, a little stevia goes a long way compared to sugar. (We learned that the hard way.) I buy mine from iherb.com. I know Target sells some too, just make sure it's nonbitter. Buy some. It's worth it!

3. OATMEAL! No instant oatmeal packets in this household. (Check out the nutrition info on those babies and stay clear!) While steel cut oats is best, I usually just buy Old Fashioned Quaker Oatmeal. Add some cinnamon, stevia, blueberries, and flaxseed and you have yourself a yummy breakfast! Speaking of flaxseed...

4. FLAXSEED! While there are many brands of flaxseed available to you, I have enjoyed Bob's Red Mill Kosher Whole Ground Flaxseed Meal. The texture is fabulous and although it does not carry much taste, it is packed full of nutrients and health benefits.  I add a tablespoon to greek yogurt, smoothies, protein balls, and as previously mentioned, oatmeal:)

What's in your canisters???

Eat real, ya'll!
~Charity~

Seven Things to Ask God

Northwest Georgia- "God's Country" :)

How often do we come before the Lord requesting better health, greater wealth, and deeper happiness in life? While these things are not bad things in themselves, they are not God's main priorities for our lives. Above all else, He desires to make us holy, or theologically speaking, to sanctify us.

Here is a list of prayers that I have prayed for myself throughout the years and I would like to encourage you to do so, as well. Rest assured, God is faithful to answer our genuine prayers to be more like Him. 

1. Lord, give me wisdom.

James 1:5 "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."

2. Lord, help me to love what You love and hate what You hate. 

Romans 12:9 "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil. Cling to what is good."

3. Lord, give me a hunger and thirst for Your Word. 

Psalms 42:1,2 "As the deer longs for the water brooks, so my soul longs for Thee, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God..." 

4. Lord, point out anything in my life that is offensive to You. 

Psalm 139:23-24 "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

5. Lord, may I desire Your will, above all else. 

Luke 22:42 "Father if You are willing, remove this cup from Me. Nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done."

6. Lord, give me a sensitivity to the whispers of the Holy Spirit. 

John 10:27 "My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me."

7. Lord, enable me to love others. 

1 Corinthians 13:2 "If I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing".

What do you feel is important to ask of the Lord?

Be set apart, ya'll!
~Charity~ 

Fourteen Books to Strengthen Your Marriage

Marriage can be very difficult, but it can also be extremely delightful if we allow the Lord to work in our hearts.  The world tells us to look within ourselves for resources, but in reality, you will never be able to discover an inner goodness or supernatural power to sustain you or your marriage. These are books that will encourage you to look outside of yourself to a Greater Strength that will enable your marriage to stand strong-that Greater Strength is the Lord Jesus Christ. Although there are still a few in this pile that I have not read yet, they are in my home library and I plan to get to them one day. Maybe you will beat me to it!

Marriage Books

1. Marriage Under Fire by James Dobson
2. The Busy Mom's Guide to Romance by Heidi St. John
3. The Mystery of Marriage by Mike Mason
4. Sheet Music by Kevin Leman 
5. The DNA of Relationships by Gary Smalley
6. Communication: Key to Your Marriage by H. Norman Wright
7. The First 90 Days of Marriage by Eric and Leslie Ludy
8. It Takes Two: The Joy of Intimate Marriage by Andrew Lester
9. Two Becoming One by Don and Sally Meredith
10. The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
11. What is it Like to be Married to Me? by Linda Dillow
12. Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
13. Real Marriage by Mark and Grace Driscoll
14. And last, but not least, Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas (I gave my copy to a friend)

What Christ-centered marriage book would you recommend?

Happy reading, ya'll!
~Charity~

Ten Books You've Got to Read

 I learned how to read at a young age (thanks, Mom) and have loved books ever since. I will post other lists based on various categories of books, but for now, here are ten books that I would highly recommend! (in really no particular order):

1. Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan

2. The Giver by Lois Lowry

3. Seduction of the Heart by Tim LaHaye 

4. The Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges (all of his books are great!)

5. Creative Counterpart by Linda Dillow (all of her books are great!)

6. When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy (check out the sequel!)

7. Worship the Way it Was Meant to Be by Robert Wetmore 

8. The Hungry Heart by Lynda Bjorklund

9. Follow Me by David Platt

10. One Thousand Gifts by Ann VosKamp 

What are some of the books on your top reading list?

Happy reading, ya'll!

~Charity~